I searched the world over, and there's still no one like her.

lucy grealy.

a name that I still associate as my personal hero. self-sacrificed and resplendent in her writing. so attuned with the identity of self and loss of it. i can't get over her. i just watched a charlie rose '94 clip of her. i had always wanted to meet her and right after reading her book in 98 i had my pen and paper ready to send telling her how much her autobiography meant to me. i had always seen myself as the lone one in this kind of a journey. but lucy's voice had shown me i wasn't. i knew what she was talking about in her story. that pain, that desire, the turbulence of emotions channeled through this particular experience. my god, she had penetrated me to the core. to this day i cannot and will not forget her. i am sorry she is no longer here, but she left us with such a deftly told courageous story beyond what many have experienced today. thank you Lucy.

blood is the new black. <-- that's what they said.

sometimes i truly believe that the gods are laughing at me. im in the dead end era. most likely im not alone. i'll leave on a happier note though, i dig milano chow. her work is ghettosketchedfabuuulous.

me

narcissism is a funny thing. oftentimes you find it creeping in places you would not have foreseen days earlier. like on the back of your head. or on a strand of hair. or, and this one is good, on the inside of your elbow. it's even funnier now when you have not only celeb-obsessed people walking around, but people who are so enamored with themselves they believe they are the celebrities themselves. it's great to hang around people who are really into themselves because you find that your sense of purpose in being their friend is greatly diminished in their presence but strangely you also find yourself tuning in to your own hidden self loving desires. "wow! your right, these yellow stockings with the red pencil skirt and brown oxfords really do look good on me! I make everything work!" I'm telling you, it's amazing what narcissism can do for you these days. you should try it out yourself. go ahead. oh wait, you've already posted 400 video clips of yourself on myspace and youtube? i rest my case.

'nude'

I'm just going to jump right into it. The fall is finally approaching; well has come upon us, officially. I have always felt alive during this season. It is for this reason I feel like my real home is in a place like San Francisco. The weather never changes there, you never have to acclimate to anything. Although I haven't traveled out of this country yet, for now, San Francisco is like the perfectly created city. It is full of enterprise, energy, intellect, fun, strength, freedom, and did I mention fun? My friends mock me for talking about it so much. I have Diarrhea mouth when it comes to speaking about that city. Hey, if you love something that much right....? Haha.

Other news, Radiohead has digitally released another album 'In Rainbows' (which I have fallen in love with by the way). That means they're going to go on tour soon! I'm incredibly stoked. And the claim for the 2008 tour is that they're going to play in bigger venues! Wooo-weee... you really have no idea how amazing this news is. Sure it's going to be mega crowded and trippy as hell, which is probably a good thing, but man that means more tickets, and maybe a less likely chance of being sold out? Well I'll snatch the tickets as soon as they become available. Maybe i'll even go back to San Francisco again and see them if they play at a venue there. So far in 2007 I have seen Bjork, Tool, Interpol, and Cat Power. I know it isn't an outstanding amount. But for the big names I'm pretty happy, everyone put on such a fantastic performance, with Cat Power taking the lead for a reformed and an improved show. What a voice on that Chan Marshall! Beautiful.

Still other news, I'm going to be running my half marathon soon. November 25th. I won't lie and say I'm not disappointed for not running the marathon. I injured myself slightly in the earlier months of training and didn't have adequate time to resume properly so I've decided to run the half instead. Give my legs some time to heal better and learn from this experience to better prepare for the future full marathons. It's the more sensible action in my humbled opinion. I'm still excited though! It's the Space Coast Marathon in Cocoa Beach/Melbourne. Space-themed!

My anniversary is this upcoming Wednesday (Halloween fright night, haha). Both Abra and I have to work, so we celebrated a little bit this past Sunday by going to Sunset Place and she bought me a Nike Triax watch (it's super slick, backed with like a 3 year warranty!) clothes from urban, up against the wall, and ae. Then we watched 'the Darjeeling Limited', which was ... okay. A bit more serious and too long for my liking. But still followed very much in the Wes Anderson vein of randomness so I'm still keen on it. Plus, the type-A compulsive Owen Wilson character was hilarious. I liked the addition of Adrien Brody too, there's something quite elegant about his acting, it's alongside that of Angelica Huston's. The day was all in all a very great and relaxing time. I almost can't believe it's going to be 4 years together already. We do plan on getting married someday. But I couldn't tell you how soon.

In more news, can you read 100 books in 100 days? Test your reading abilities in that challenge. (google BBC's read 100 books in 100 days and you'll understand what I'm talking about)

Well, I should attempt to sleep earlier this time around. So haircuts pending and pages in effect, I'll catch you kiddos later. Maybe that F train. ;-P