I'm going to skip divided

I'm not going to complete that previous story. I'm a month late and too much else has lapsed for me to recount. I do have to return again in July to New York, the tickets have been purchased and everything. It's a lazy Sunday afternoon and in typical lazy Sunday afternoons, I'm in front of my computer writing. I could write about this weekend. I could write about getting sloshed at a gay bar. I could write about seeing Sex and the City, the ultimate chick flick. I could write about seeing my honey for like 2 minutes. I could write about watching yet another chick flick - 2 Days in Paris. I could write about my workout. And waitaminute here, I just did. So there. But it all seems so lackadaisical. Not that I don't love my sweety, not that I don't enjoy going out sometimes, nor enjoy watching chick flicks (at times). But seriously, doesn't it almost seem pointless sometimes?

I'm definitely glad I got to see some of the greatest friends of mine this weekend. People that I haven't seen since ... the Radiohead concert was it? I believe so. But I feel distant. Almost like I can't relate right now. I feel like I can't relate to anyone really. That feeling of being at peace has almost slipped away. Sometimes I can't decipher my own feelings. Is it a void? What is it? So I shall go to New York again, have surgery, and come back. I start school in August. I'm definitely excited about the prospect of attending classes again. But even that doesn't seem to fill or qualify. I can't explain the feeling I have, so I've been immersing myself again in reading. I have goals of reading more public health materials and classics this summer. It's what you do when you feel as if this world is not your home. I know I sound all ridiculously esoteric and all. It's just that I don't have the words to express the feelings. The divide feels deeper and darker.